I loved you on my own terms
I
Recalled the good things that ended so soon
Possibly Glad I
Made it to eight before my fate
A boy’s home
The trigger that said
Let’s try hate

Your lack of love made me sad
Always
Searching for a loving Mum
Yet
All I found
Was an Angry dad

You turned me to Old Joe
In the end
A young boy with no one
Where else would I go?
For years Ma you were a no show

I have done exactly this to my very own

It destroyed my ability to love anyone
It always seemed so okay to walk away
To hide
No love in my heart no pride
Just so scared of failure

Sorrow has come around now
My own children suffer
For I am an untrained dad
Still
I have little to give anyone
Except the courage to try

I cried for you for four years mother
You never even visited
Now you are gone and I will never know
What it was that made you

All those years ago
Just let me go
Yet
I would have you back in my life tomorrow
For just one hug